We've All Got Issues // All The Single Ladies Put Your Hands Up.

I don't know if anyone else is the same or going through the same things but currently I feel so "blaahhhh" and there are a million reasons as to why. 

I am writing openly in this post about my current reservations.

It's not always easy to talk out loud to a real life person but it is somewhat easier to write it down to access what is really going on. 

In life there are no easy ways out nor are there magic fixes for things, especially feelings. No one can tell you how you should be feeling because deep down you want to acknowledge the fact that the 'good advice' is right but you cannot change everything that is spinning in your mind. 

I don't have a massive close knit group of friends so right now this is the next best thing, I can vent, explain and ponder on what I write on here. It gives me some comfort to know that I may not be the only one who is having a massive frickin ball of doom hanging over my head. 

I cannot say that 2015 has been the worst year ever because it's not, admittedly it's had its ups and downs but in the last few months I have had to evaluate a lot of things going on in my life. 

SINGLE WOMAN SEEKS SOMEONE... NOT JUST ANYONE... RIGHT NOW... YOU! 

To start off, I have been single for what, like... 6 years now and I thought I was okay with it. It turns out I am not, I am 28 and I am still god damn single, childless and still living with my parents. 

Hardly living the dream, right?! 

After a while it gets you down, a lot of friends have moved to the big smoke and I am left here amongst bails of hay and road kill. Not ideal. The fall out from this is that I rarely get out, a night out has become a thing of the past... A distant memory. Its tragic. How on earth am I meant to meet someone when most people don't even know I exist?! 

The guys I do meet are jerks... Actually complete asshole's and the one's I genuinely like are either taken, gay or I am firmly in their friend zone. What is actually up with that? 

I mean what is that above? Who even say's that?! THIS is why I am picky!! 

Why is it, when you find someone that you click with, feel comfortable with and can be yourself with they are untouchable? So many questions that need answering but unfortunately I don't have the resolution. 

It's rare that I can be like that with someone. The worst is when you were completely oblivious to any 'feelings' going on and then it suddenly hits you in the face like "oh hi, I thought you were doing so well but here, have a bunch of freaking emotions and thoughts. That should change things" :) 

And then, BAM.. It's hit you with full force like you have been pied in the face.

How are you meant to tell someone that you want more than what you are now without losing them forever? Catch twenty two situation, you don't tell them and you feel like you are dying a slow death. Or you tell them and risk digging your own grave. Either way you will not win the battle. 

That is happening to me and it sucks serious ass because... What, you cannot actually tell the person what you're feeling. What if what you're actually feeling isn't about the person in question but of a general situation that you are confusing into conjunction with reality? You cannot let this affect the relationship/friendship because THAT is total suicide. Plus, who am I kidding. It's never going to happen. 

 I just want the small things but that has become a game of cat and mouse. So many games. Why so many games?

Then your mind works over time just to put you on edge even more than you are already. "Do they think the same?" "No, they won't be thinking the same because er... they don't even know that you're thinking what you're thinking". Forget about the meat sweats it's the fear sweats that you need to be afraid of. 

Arrgghhhh, I really dislike being a woman sometimes because all these little hormones kick in and make you seem like a picnic short of a packet of crisps. We are NOT though, we are just trying to work out our irrational selves.   

I cry at everything at the moment (in secret as I don't like crying in front of people). I blame the music in a lot the things I watch... It can't possibly be ME!! I am a happy soul and I don't like feeling crappy. I thought it was about a main reason, I think it was about that main reason. Maybe it's not. Who knows?! 

I wish I was one of those people who could just switch off completely but I can't. I am learning and it's hard. You wouldn't be able to tell though because I hide the reality from my face. Poker face expert me. :D

Being an adult really isn't all that fun, I want to be in London... Since I was young I have always said I will move to London and then to New York (obviously I wasn't thinking straight back then as I have a fear of flying. Ha). I am just too scared to do it on my own. I really do annoy myself. 

I love how I am just venting here and most of it probably doesn't even make sense. 

2016 is now here and I don't know what the hell that's going to bring me, but it better be some good luck. 

I want to be in a job/career that I love and if that does mean moving to London then that's what I will have to do. Maybe have a panic attack in between. Ha. 

And I want all the other things that a woman wants in life. 

Right now, I am biding my time for all the right reasons, that said, doing so will bring me all the things that I want.

Hopefully.  

WeArePlanes// The Intimate Planes Gig!!!

Oh hi. 

This afternoon I have another 'life' post for you, one of which is within the same genre as the last post. Music and gigs.

As you have guessed from the very obvious title to this post I will be indeed sharing my night at the Planes gig with y'all! 

Now, some of you may not of heard of the band Planes and if you haven't what are you playing at?! 

Okay, so a brief low-down. 

On my previous post I talked about the Placebo concert I went to, now the drummer Steve Forrest who used to be in Placebo left this year to focus solely on his band 'Planes'. I am SO glad he left Placebo (no offence intended) because now I have another band who I love as much. The band consist of five members, Steve, Charlotte, Ted, Dan and Ed and their new (self-released) album 'Hotfoot' is out to pre-order now. http://weareplanes.bandcamp.com/ (Go on click the link. :) 

Their music is frickin awesome, I never really knew about the band until I saw Steve on Twitter talking a lot more about them, so I thought I would listen to their stuff and oh my aren't I glad I did because their sound is very much up my street. It's melodic, energetic, thought provoking and beautiful. 

So, when I heard they were going to be doing a mini UK tour and were coming to Birmingham I had to get a ticket. 

15.04.15 was the day.

I was working on the day of the gig and I asked if I could have my lunch at the end of the day so I could get there in time. 

Dedication right there. 

Seriously now, I literally got stuck in every traffic jam going and I was getting so annoyed. Does anyone else get that, when they want to be somewhere quickly all the traffic lights go to red, you end up behind some stupid Sunday driver or you get stuck in queues? 

Well all of those happened to me. Now I believe in "everything happens for a reason" and now I know why I was stuck in all of that traffic, because when I arrived at the venue all the band members were outside. :O 

That happens to me every time I go to a gig, I seem to pull up right next to the artist(s) and then I freeze and miss my chance to talk to them. I just hate it when I see other people running up to musicians asking for pictures and autographs, because deep down I want to be one of those people but you end up falling into the 'groupie' category and that's not me. I just want to chat, hangout, get to know the person/people and yeah get a picture or autograph so I can do a blog post on them. 

Just like I am doing now. 

My parents took me the gig and my dad was like "isn't that Steve" as we pulled up to park. Ha, me being me I was like "oh I don't want to go over to them in case I invade their space" my dad literally forced me out of the car because he knows I am too polite ha ha. 

I had my massive boots on again ( I should of learnt from the Placebo gig) and strolled across the road to them hoping to god I didn't fall over. And I was SO surprised at how warm and welcoming they all were. I had been talking to Charlotte a lot on Twitter and occasionally Steve and Dan. And Charlotte gave me a lovely hug and I felt a lot more at ease. 

I turned to Steve and all I could manage at that point was a "hi" and he was so lovely and chatty I lost control of my limbs and went in for the hug. Now 'the hug' is a risky little game because you either go in for the kill and it's reciprocated or you get shot down and die right there on the spot. 

He gave me the nicest hug back and really made an effort to find out about myself and engage with me personally. I have never seen that from a band really before, I mean genuine interest and totally laidbackness. And Charlotte was talking to me like she knew me for like forever. I was really overwhelmed. 

It was very surreal and it just made me love them even more. 

I am not going to lie, as I didn't want to ask for a picture together as I was too shy, I sneakily took this shot of Steve. 

I'm like a stealth ninja ;) 

This post is going to be a long one if I don't get down to the 'gig' part. 

You ready? 

So this venue was a cute little pub in Birmingham which had this very cool walk through. 

   I went through to the staging area and YEEESSSSSS I was at the very front. I was loving life. 

The support band Jeremy & the Harlequins had flew in all the way from New York and they certainly had some character. They were so lively and raring to go. There wasn't loads and loads of people at the gig as Planes are relatively new but I found that better as you got an intimate gig and it felt somewhat personal. I think it was one of the best gigs I have been too! No joke. 

One of the members from Jeremy & the Harlequins, Craig, introduced himself to me whilst I was waiting for them to go on and handed me his mobile phone and asked me to take some pictures of their performance for him. 

Obviously I said yes, but he was rather trusting with his belongings. Good job I wasn't a chav that would of made way with it. Ha. 

Seeing as I took A LOT of pics/video's on his phone I didn't have much time to take my own but I did get an action shot!!!

They were really good and they had an 'Elvis' vibe going on which I thought was pretty cool. The music matched that vibe too. It was nice because I was listening to stuff that wouldn't usually interest me, but I found that I actually really enjoyed it. 

A really smooth and friendly band with charisma to boot. 

Planes were now on stage and I must say they are all bloody hot. A very good looking band indeed. They have amazing chemistry, highly talented and their songs are effortlessly catchy. Charlotte's violin broke that day so she carried on with the keyboard and you wouldn't of even known that the violin was meant to be in there. Highly skilled people. 

I am a singer with, what some people say, a 'unique voice', whether that's good or bad I don't know but when I go to see people that inspire me and who I respect as an artist, it makes me want to be on that stage even more and allows me to hang on to that dream a little longer. Planes showed that night that even with a small crowd that they were still going to give it their all and put on an electrifying performance and there was so much positive energy. 

All the songs they played I loved, especially 'Legs', 'My Own Way' 'Grinding Teeth' and 'Wait It Out'. If you want to hear any clips of me singing their stuff you will find it on my Instagram https://instagram.com/anythingbutordinaryleya/ or on my Twitter account https://twitter.com/leluroxxblogger

After the concert, they came and mingled with us at the bar, took photo's with us and signed our 'merch'. I really wanted photo's with each of them for this post and for my own memories but I was far to shy to ask and didn't want to annoy anyone. I wish I had of just asked now. 

Maybe next time? 

It was a real special night, one of which I will never forget and they are THE nicest band I have met to date I didn't expect them to speak to me let alone come and sit and talk with me after the show.

Their music is very 'now' and I cannot stop listening to it. When I buy into a band I do so generously and it is the same with other bands I love such as 'The Mirror Trap' who supported Placebo. 

I will leave you with some photo's I took of the gig. :) 

Charlotte

Steve & Dan

Ted (with the hair up), Dan & Ed (on the drums)

Rock'in the stage!!

  

I hope you liked reading about my thoughts and experiences and don't forget to go check them out, it will be something you won't regret. 

Peace. 

L x